Twas the night before a very safe Christmas

’Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the site,
Not a hazard was stirring, not even a light.
The lockouts were hung on the panels with care,
In hopes that St. Safety soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While near-miss reports danced in Dad’s head.
And Mama in earplugs, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a risk-free nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to assess what’s the matter.
Away to the window I tip-toed with grace—
After checking the floor for trip hazards, just in case.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave a slip-resistant sparkle to objects below.
When what to my PPE-trained eyes should appear,
But a well-inspected sleigh and eight reindeer in gear.

With a little old driver so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment—his training was slick.
More rapid than forklifts his reindeer they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name:

“Now Harness! Now Hardhat! Now Gloves and Eye Wash!
On Airhorn! On Guardrails! On Spill Kit and Staunch!
To the top of the porch! Keep three points of contact!
Now dash away safely, be careful, don’t slack!”

As dry leaves that before a safe blower would fly,
They rose to the roof without risking the sky.
So up to the housetop the reindeer ascended,
With a sleigh full of gifts properly labeled and tended.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each steel-toed hoof.
As I tightened my robe and was turning around,
Down the chimney came Santa with a non-slip bound.

He was dressed all in Nomex from his head to his boot,
And his clothes were all tested for flame-resistant use.
A bundle of toys he had slung with great care—
Ergonomically balanced to reduce wear and tear.

His eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!
His cheeks free from hazards, his nose sanitary!
His droll little mouth wore a respirator tight,
To filter the soot as he worked through the night.

He spoke not a word but went straight to his task,
Conducting a safety check, as one rightly should ask.
He tagged every toy with instructions so clear:
“Read before using… keep away from reindeer.”

Then, laying a finger aside of his nose,
With a gesture compliant to workplace SOPs, he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh with a satisfied grin,
For no incident report was required again.

But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
“Stay safe and be merry, and to all a good night!
May your Christmas be joyful, your hazards all slight,
And may every tomorrow be OSHA-compliant and bright!”